Ever wondered why sometimes when you meet up with your close friend after months of not seeing that person or talking to that person for months, you have nothing to say to them and its not like what it was before? Maybe you have spoken to that person but it was a mere oh how are you, how's school, how's life?? coping well? Got Bf or Gf? You know all those questions to ask when you have nothing to say.
Well lately i've been thinking about it and i realized that i actually had a lot of close friends, notice the past tense, in life in the course of growing up. The sad thing is that i dont talk to most of them anymore, not that we argued and stop being friends or anything or we were angry at each other, but it was just the mere lack of communication, that caused the breakdown in our friendship. It sad because i really had a lot of close friends that meant so much to me but i just stopped talking to them, either because we're in a different school and i dont have their msn addresses or i just totally stop txting them because both of our lives are just so different and its just so hard to catch up because we're too busy. Like i have SOOO many friends like that, and i really was really close to them and we told each other everything and now i mean i still feel close to them when i meet them and i know i can always talk to them if i need help or anything cause i know they'll be there but it just sucks.
Then theres the OTHER group of friends that fight with you, those that hate you for one reason or another and think that difference is a bad thing. Those that were once close to you but for reasons which were unknown to you before but suddenly the sun came out from the cloudy sky shown on the earth and showed you the exact reason why they were such assholes and jerks. Is it a bad thing to feel nothing for them? That nothingness just comes into your mind when you think back years down the road? Or that even every good memory you had with them has been washed away from the rain? Well i honestly think we shouldnt care about people like that. Why? because they dont deserve our pity. You see the thing is that its not like we dont want to be their friends, but they just choose not to want to be our friends. However there is a twist, to say that you must at least make an effort to try to be their friends again, but usually you get turned down. At least you know your conscience is clear and you tried to mend the broken friendship but however its a 2 way thing and if the other party doesnt want to try then why bother? So it just all boils down to one question, did you even mean anything to them in the first place or you were just some toy they decided to play or experiment with? After toying with your emotions for a while, they kinda got bored of you and said 'OH maybe we werent made for each other, you're not the toy i want, people have been saying bad things about you and i dont want to play with you anymore!' And then decide you werent giving them as much pleasure as they expected you to, so they DUMP you and leave you hanging there thinking what you did wrong in sadness. When you ask for an explanation, they come up with crap about how you werent the toy that they were looking for when you know that there were other reasons but they just had no balls to admit.
Well thats just life i guess? Nothing you can really do about it.
Then there are friends who you know that you can ALWAYS depend on even when the conversations that you have with them arent frequent. However the intensity of the conversations that you have overwrites the frequency of your conversations. Theres just so much going on when the 2 of you communicate with each other and you feel so much in that conversation. That friend motivates you when you tell them all your problems and you get uplifted. Realization kicks in and you get enlightened! Both of you share the same sentiments and you are convicted about what you discuss and you act on it. Its these friends that you should keep because they are the ones that can see you thru life because you know that though the both of you are busy with your own lives, you learn make time for each other no matter what the circumstances. And when the both of you do talk, its just like iron sharpening iron and you know that you'll get thru life easier because that person is going thru the same thing as you. And even if they arent, you know that they will try their best to give you advise to the best of their knowledge or at least be your crying shoulder so that you can lean on. When you're down they pick you up, they tell you things that you wished someone would tell you. They'd go all out for you no matter where they are and sacrifice what they have for you because they know that if it was them that was going thru a rough patch, you'd do the same for them as well because they mean so much to you. They never fail to make you happy and they are the ones that make it last forever! (:
2 people i want to thank,
Mike - you're the most amazing person ever! thanks heaps mate
Kandy - I love you (:
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